ࡱ> ( / 0DTimes New Romand\bDbv 0\b( 0:DWingdingsRomand\bDbv 0\b( 0: DjwiԚdingsRomand\bDbv 0\b( 0:A0DArialngsRomand\bDbv 0\b( 0:"@De0}fԚngsRomand\bDbv 0\b( 0:PDffԚngsRomand\bDbv 0\b( 0 ` .  @n?" dd@  @@`` `X0nC  );  >?AB<=@ '' #& ''  C FGHIJKLMNOPQR*`+a,b-c/d0e1f3g4h5i6j7k8l9m:nSTUV W!X"Y#Z$[%\&!]'$^('_2 DE.  0e0e A@A18c8c     ?1d0u0@Ty2 NP'p<'p@A)BCD|E?@8-.g4<d<dv 0PbPppp@  p3ʚ;|'ʚ;<4dd|b{ 0hbb<4dddd|b{ 0hbb<4cdcd|b{ 0hbb:2___PPT9/ 0? 500&pQ'`a[ YUO\'`lnv T'`b<cHc0 c1 PMelvin W. Wong, Ph.D. ÞIP^ ZSX Licensed Clinical Psychologist ChristianMentalHealth.com 220 Montgomery Street, Suite 1098, San Francisco, California, U.S.A. (`N o)F c&c" (,$!c"c$c "$ The Ethics of TreatmentIs Ego-Dystonic Homosexuality a Disease? What is unwanted Same-Sex-Attraction? Homosexuality vs. Gay? Genetics versus Environmental influences Hamer  Gay Gene LaVey  Brain Dissection Pillard & Bailey  Twin Studies Review of Treatment literature6))tFailure in (Father) Male-Attachment  Defensive Detachment  ;$('(Defensive Detachment Dr. Elizabeth Moberly Dr. Jospeh Nicolosi NARTH: National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality Gender Identity Disorder Dr. George Rekers Treatment for Adolescent Sexual Disorders Average 3.5 year-old Boys with gender identity confusion GID: Cross-dressing+FP*MB+F  *M/tFailure in (Father) Male-Attachment  Defensive Detachment  ;$('Object-Relations: Separation-Individuation Self-Identity Development: Who-What am I? Mom-Son: Physical-Emotional Detachment & Attachment Son-Dad: Bonding (Attachment failure: rejection)  Rejection = Pain; Detachment = No Pain Son-Dad relationship Disturbance  Sour Grape Syndrome as a defense against more hurts Avoids father: No  Aggressiveness-Toughness, etc. +Z"i+ *,)+"hFailure in (Father) Male-Attachment  Defensive Attachment to Mother (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)*l$("'& Homosexuality primarily an Identity Disturbance A Disturbance of a person s Gender Identity A Disturbance of the Masculine Identity Development Upon failure to Attach (Separation-Individuation task) Defensive Detachment from Father Son s resultant yearning for Male attention and affirmation Curiosity for the unfamiliar:  Male aspects of Masculinity ID Causing a Defensive Attachement to Mother Son s Masculinity Development became frustrated & stops Over familiarity-socialization with females: No  Intrigue xZ!{*s\k!{*s  w }!Masculinity Identity Disturbances "+ +Victim of sexual abuse: Molestation-rape Pre-mature same sex sensitivity & curiosity Mixed emotions: Attention-Getting, Pain-Pleasure reversal Over-Identification with Mother-Sisters-Aunts Over-familiarity:  Know them (women) too well! Suffocation: Enmeshment-Limits & Boundary Dislike-Anger-Rage:  family s emotional baronmeter Role Reversals:  My mother s keeper! Misogynist Labeling that turns to a  Self-fulfilling prophesy  I am gay  I behave gay  Once gay, always gay UFhZZ4Z1ZU :.0*4041 B > Masculinity Identity Deficits Body Discomfort Dissatisfaction-rejection: own body Self insecurity: Emotional over-sensitivity  cave-ins Rejection of the  Real Self (Peer dependence) Yearning (craving) for the  perfect man body Attraction (obsessing-preoccupation) of Men Neurotic need for  Symbolic Union with  Man ,  Manhood ,  Symbols of Men Military, Police, Uniform, Power-Predation, Bondage6745 6],K 451 Reference OneDHomosexuality: A New Christian Ethic Elizabeth R. Moberly, (1983 56 pages) Published by James Clarke & Co, Cambridge England British Pound 2.95 (USD $ 9.00)(%F$x$73%Homosexuality: A New Christian Ethic(&%F0DShifts focus of debate from symptoms to root causes Psychoanalytic Interpretation  the homosexual condition involves legitimate developmental needs, the fulfillment of which has been blocked by an underlying ambivalence to members of the same sex. 84ZR$F#84%Homosexuality: A New Christian Ethic&&F0She sets the separation between  homosexual-orientation from  homosexual-activities She coined the term  Defensive Detachment |P",F,3,F,,6F,,695, Defensive Detachment F0 Same-Sex Ambivalence  An Approach Avoidance Conflict For Males and Females Male and Female HomosexualitymmD:6, Defensive Detachment F0Why Defensive Detachment? From  Attachment theory of John Bowby With Attachment, there is Detachment How a child-toddler learns autonomy Identity Formation and Development A Dynamic process of Attaching-Detaching The  Psychological-Birth of an infantHL'DLD'D;7Family Tree Diagram (DF( <8Healthy Relationship *DF( =9Healthy RelationshipD @<Unhealthy Relationship BeginsD A=2Unhealthy Relationship Defensive Detachment Begins63DD3D B> Reference TwoDReparative Therapy of Male Homosexuality A New Clinical Approach Joseph Nicolosi, Ph.D. (1991, 355 pages) Published by Jason Aronson Inc. New Jersey, London $32.00*ZP) -PBF$B$B B-B$D@)Reparative Therapy of Male Homosexuality(*)F0D  Reparative Homosexuality as a  Reparative Drive  Defensive Detachment Failure of the Father-Son Bond Failure of the Father-Son RelationshipDEAReference ThreeDThe Psychological Birth of the Human Infant Symbiosis and Individuation Margaret S. Mahler, Fred Pine & Anni Bergman (1975 308 pages) Published by Basic Books, Inc. Publishers, New York (Hardcover USD $45 Paperback $22)HZnFZ xJP,DF(/B$B'B$#BdRoots of Homosexuality  Some Predisposing Factors 36Sensitive Temperaments: Gender non-conforming Causes detachment from peers Causes humiliation  Peer Abuse : Shame and Self Deficits Shame: a vulnerable feeling where self is eroded away Obsessiveness: Preoccupation with what he doesn t have Attracted to the opposite qualities: Physique When the  unattainable and exotic become Erotic Perfectionistic: No rough-&-tumble play (Too aggressive) Seeks Attention, Approval, Affection & Affirmation You can t affirm what you don t have (gay sex).Z?ZZ6Z7Z_Z9ZbZ.?67_  9  b  wRHealthy Relationship *DF( xSHealthy RelationshipD yTDDealing with the question of  Why ##F(Family developmental history Defensive detachment & Defensive Attachment Father-Absence & Mother-Enmeshment Childhood traumatic experiences Sexual violation and verbal abuse Opposite-sex peer friendships Same-sex peer friendships Develop theory of attraction for understandingpo"hB,oF"FhFzUHealthy Relationship *DF( {VHealthy RelationshipD |WUnhealthy Relationship BeginsD }X2Unhealthy Relationship Defensive Detachment Begins*3DF+ ~Y2Unhealthy Relationship Defensive Attachment BeginsL3D F+ F+3F+ Z5Unhealthy Relationship Defensive Attachment ContinuesL6D F+ F+3 F+ [7Unhealthy Relationship Defensive Attachment IntensifiesL8D F+ F+3 F+ \7Unhealthy Relationship Defensive Attachment IntensifiesL8D F+ F+3 F+ ]7Unhealthy Relationship Defensive Attachment IntensifiesL8D F+ F+3 F+ ^6Unhealthy Relationship Defensive Attachment SolidifiesL7D F+ F+3 F+ _6Unhealthy Relationship Defensive Attachment SolidifiesL7D F+ F+3 F+ Treatment IssuesFactors affecting prognosis Therapist/Client match Transference/Counter-transference issues Object Relations Nonsexual male relationships Group therapy The role of father and religious support groups0YCSame-Sex Attraction vs. GayD A person with same-sex attraction  A homosexual person vs.  homosexual  A person with gay feelings vs.  I am gay Clarify labeling of  problem-issue-disorder  Attraction does not make an identity Separate the description from the identity Take away labeling of a behavior as identityX#)ZD>Specific Treatment Areas (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)&?*& Ideational (Mindset) Reduction of Intrusive Thoughts Behavioral Reduce Masturbation & Acting-Outs Relational Increase Male Non-Sexual Friendships Spiritual Increase Pursuit of Holiness-MaturityP P P"P P%P P&P$ $ #"$ $%"   $&"[EESpecific Male Treatment Issues (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)4F*"& Ideations: Reduction of Intrusive Thoughts Explain thought origin, validation not encouragement Desperate crave for same-sex intimacy and acceptance Develop insight into precursors of thoughts: HALT Re-interpret to reframe the meaning of the thoughts Neediness and affirmation of needs Re-direct thoughts with more competitive thoughts Accountability partner-  tell a friend Medication: SSRI s (Selective-Serotonin-Reuptake Inhibitors) Paroxetine:Paxil, Sertraline:Zoloft, Fluoxetine:Prozac+55f#2(=7+ 55f#2  (  +7\FESpecific Male Treatment Issues (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)4F*"& 4Behaviors: Reduce Masturbation & Acting-Out Goal is to reduce frequency and intensity Check-in with client weekly: Accountability How did it feel afterwards?  Good but bad! Reduce stimuli: No Cyperporn, chats, media Positive-Negative reinforcements Commendations, Loss of spouse, rubber-bands Medication: SSRI s (Selective-Serotonin-Reuptake Inhibitors) Paroxetine:Paxil, Sertraline:Zoloft, Fluoxetine:Prozac,ZVZ,ZMZ,Z=Z7Z,V,M,  +  7 f Addiction-Acting-Out Cycle Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000$A# 4Compulsivity Deprivation Impulsivity Satiation8FZP5]GJThe Physical Intimacy-Orgasmic Cycle (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)&K%%&  Intimacy Always Feels Good!  Emotional Intimacy Leads to Physical Intimacy!  Physical Intimacy Can Lead to Orgasm!  Orgasm Always Feels Good!  Orgasmic Feeling is Intimacy? Physical Intimacy is an Antidote for: Loneliness, Low-Self Worth, Boredom, Aggression, Anger, Despair, Abandonment (Applies to Heterosexuals and Homosexuals) P&Py&N+^HLThe Addiction (Modified from Patrick Carnes, Ph.D. & Steven Arterburn, M.S.)$M?; Craving-tension-urge to get emotionally intimate with others Mental-Emotional-Visual Triggers Pain Repression with immediate Sexual Longing Fantasy Development-Planning Begins (The Thrill begins) The Hunt (The Intrigue)^Pg0 ZF)))((((((((((_ILThe Addiction (Modified from Patrick Carnes, Ph.D. & Steven Arterburn, M.S.)$M?; The Connection  Rush Altered state of awareness The Act Under-Control: Impulsivity: Binge The Fulfillment Orgasm: Feeling Dissociation The Let-Down Self-Blame: Numbness The Vow Over-Control: Compulsivity: Rigidity The Cycle Returns again (Deprivation Sets-In)F"< <"F<FFF F%<.F$ $""$$$"$ $   $  $  $    $$$% $$$c Addiction-Acting-Out Cycle Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000$A# 4Compulsivity Deprivation Impulsivity Satiation8FZP5`JESpecific Male Treatment Issues (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)4F*"& >Relational: Increase Male non-sexual friendships Reduce same-sex pedestal effect of males Develop insight of over-adulation and devaluation Develop courage to befriend attractive males Sexual-attraction desensitization, ego-stability  I m one of the guys!  I can t believe I belong! Learn to keep relationships: Reduce jealousy Group meetings-activities with guys Attend regular self-help groups: EA, SA s, Exodus1Z)Z2Z-ZZ$Z2Z1)2-$  2aKESpecific Male Treatment Issues (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)4F*"& Spiritual: Increase Pursuit of Holiness-Maturity Increase involvement in local place of worship Accountability within the family of God Acceptance: To accept and be accepted & affirmed  Will overcoming desires Spiritual Discipline: Process of sanctification Daily renewal of spiritual relationship Personal relationship with the Lord-Jesus-Brotherhood Place to  give-back  re-invest as messengers Provide hope for other struggling on the journey1Z/ZYZZXZ6Z/Z1Z1/YX  6/1bLNew Male BehaviorsSelf-Acceptance: Body-Comfort: I m okay! Male-Resocialization: I am one of the guys! Mother will be okay if I let her go! Mom, do you want a son or a nurse? I can t be both! Accountability Person: No more secrets! Female-Resocialization From  I want a masculine woman who is not dependent To  Women can be feminine and they are attractive. {Z4Z(ZPjZ{3(64cM4Femininity Identity Crisis Development of LesbianismF5((((Great hurts and pains from males Fathers who failed or abused them Believes mother is weak as a woman Rejects self as women; Rejects womanhood (Pain) as being unsafe Sexual abuse-promiscuity resulting in men-hating  If I can be a man I will be safe from harm! Multi-layered-loose clothes,  Walk like a man, talks like a man  I hate make-up  It s oppressive-sexism-slave! "P"P#P@P_ZrZ"$" # @ _r  dNLSpecific Treatment Issues for Lesbians (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)&M'%& HAcknowledge-resolve sexual abuse(s) Work through pain to develop male-trust again Reconciliation with Mother and Father Say goodbye to girlfriends Attempt to embrace femininism Put on a dress? Try cosmetics. Try high heels Have feminine affirmation by male-females Involve with women s groups~$Z.Z_Z.ZFZ$._.FeOSaying Good-ByesDSetting the Record Straight:  Real Love? Needs and Dependence Exploitations: Dominant vs. Submissive Relationships that met needs  Looking for love in the wrong places There were positives about past relationships The Ingredient of Respect Establish Same Sex (non-physical) relationships *<U1*<U/    fPEmergence of the New-Self,Overcoming the Expectations of Old Community Change always unstablizing: Courage to move on Rejection of others:  You have Changed! What happened? Establishing a New Social Paradigm Relationships are Neutral-Mutual: Non-Shame based Male Non-Sexual Relationships Female  Non-Default Relationships: No more  Safe-Retreats Female Emotional-Physical-Sexual Relationships Overcoming Fears: Enmeshment, Physical-Sexual  Space Dependency vs. Initiative Behaviors:  Take a Lead! Making a Commitment: Litmus Test of Enmeshment Resolution -ZgZ#ZZZ,/8# P</6  4  ;  : gQWhat is Healing & Recovery?Presence or Absence of SSA? (Thoughts) Realistic Expectations: Some Traces of SSA Memories Can t be Completely Obliterated, But Emotions Can Reduce Significantly Degree or Intensity of SSA s? Orientation? Overwhelming vs.  In Passing  Non-Dwelling The Recovered vs. The Strugglers Addiction Cycles: Presence or Absence? Intrusive Thoughts (Orientation?) Preoccupation & Obsessions Secret vs. Honesty Litmus Tests: Stressful Times, Unstructured Times'F{P+F-P!<wF2Z'+O+,!w2ESpecific Male Treatment Issues (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)(F*"& Ideations: Reduction of Intrusive Thoughts Explain thought origin, validation not encouragement Desperate crave for intimacy and acceptance Develop insight into precursors of thoughts: HALT Re-interpret to reframe the meaning of the thoughts Neediness and affirmation needs Re-direct thoughts with more competitive thoughts Accountability partner-tell a friend Medication: SSRI s (Selective-Serotonin-Reuptake Inhibitors) Fluoxetine:Prozac, Sertraline:Zoloft, Paroxetine:Paxil+5,f 2%=7+ 5,f 2  %  B+B7B*,ESpecific Male Treatment Issues (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)(F*"& Behaviors: Reduce Masturbation & Acting-Outs Goal is to reduce frequency and intensity Check-in with client weekly: Accountability How did it feel afterwards?  Good but bad! Reduce stimuli: No Cyperporn, chats, media Positive-Negative reinforcements Commendations, Loss of spouse, rubber-bands Medication: Prozac, Zoloft, Paxil help-ZVZ,ZMZ,Z'Z-V,M,'+-ESpecific Male Treatment Issues (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)(F*"& >Relational: Increase Male non-sexual friendships Reduce same-sex pedestal effect of males Develop insight of over-adulation and devaluation Develop courage to befriend attractive males Sexual-attraction desensitization, ego-stability  I m one of the guys!  I can t believe I belong! Learn to keep relationships: reduce jealousy Group meetings-activities with guys Attend regular self-help groups: EA, SA s, Exodus1Z)Z2Z-ZZ$Z2Z1)2-$  1 :Femininity Identity Crisis & the Development of Lesbianism*;((!(Great hurts and pains from males Fathers who failed or abused them Believes mother is weak as a woman Rejects self as women; Rejects womanhood (Pain) as being unsafe Sexual abuse-promiscuity resulting in men-hating  If I can be a man I will be safe from harm! Multi-layered-loose clothes,  Walk like a man, talks like a man  I hate make-up  It s oppressive-sexism-slave! "P"P#P@P_ZrZ"$" # @ _r  $&&What do Lesbians say about themselves?''$ I m unhappy with being a woman; it s weakness  When I discovered the gay bar, I finally came home  I feel like I am a man in a woman s body I don t need men, I hate-despise them!  I am more  homo-emotional than homosexual  Smoking, alcohol and drugs are cool!  You don t understand how we love, it s better!  Women is a stronger sex! Men are weak! (g06,.LSpecific Treatment Issues for Lesbians (Copyright Melvin Wong, Ph.D. 2000)M'%& XAcknowledge-resolve sexual abuse(s) Work through pain to develop male-trust again Reconciliation with Mother and Father Say goodbye to girlfriends Attempt to embrace feminine qualities Put on a dress? Try cosmetics. Try high heels Have feminine affirmation by male-females Involve with women s groupsj$Z.ZgZ.ZFZ$.g.F&(New Male BehaviorsSelf-Acceptance: Body-Comfort: I m okay! Male-Resocialization: I am one of the guys! Mother will be okay if I let her go! Mom, do you want a son or a nurse? I can t be both! Accountability Person: No more secrets! Female-Resocialization From  I want a masculine woman who is not dependent To  Women can be feminine and they are attractive. t{Z4Z(ZPjZ{3(j')Emergence of the New-Self,Overcoming the Expectations of Old Community Change always unstablizing: Courage to move on Rejection of others:  You have Changed! What happened? Establishing a New Social Paradigm Relationships are Neutral-Mutual: Non-Shame based Male Non-Sexual Relationships Female  Non-Default Relationships: No more  Safe-Retreats Female Emotional-Physical-Sexual Relationships Overcoming Fears: Enmeshment, Physical-Sexual  Space Dependency vs. Initiative Behaviors:  Take a Lead! Making a Commitment: Litmus Test of Enmeshment Resolution -PgP#PPZ,/8# P</6  4  ;  //What is Healing & Recovery?@TPresence or Absence of SSA  Orientation ? Realistic Expectations: Some Traces of SSA Memories Can t be Completely Obliterated, But Emotions Can Reduce Significantly Degree or Intensity of SSA s? Overwhelming vs.  In Passing  Non-Dwelling The Recovered vs. The Strugglers Addiction Cycles: Presence or Absence? Intrusive Thoughts Preoccupation & Obsessions Secret vs. Honesty Litmus Tests: Stressful Times, Unstructured Times*F{PF-F!<h<2<*D+DOFDD,FD!DhD2Fd*Yy 25:34-40"a ( re/fsTSv `OPb6r܌yv SObSuRNNOp`OP@bPv WVpbN `OPf}bT 4nN `OPf}bUb\O[e `OPYubOObd2Ԛ `OPf}bzbuN0`OP wgbb(Wvψ `OPO wb00N1\VT{0;NJU bPuBfP`ON f}`OT 4nN f}`OUuBfP`O\O[e Yu`OOO b/fd2Ԛ f}`OzSuBfP`OuN b/f(Wvψ O w`ObT04ngc   e sVT{0b[(WJT4`OP NN`OPeZP(Wb_DQ-NN Pg\v N 1\/fZP(Wb NN00 *Yy 25:34-40LAg("c(c Z  Religious Support GroupsLExodus International (North-America) ExodusNorthAmerica.org ChristianMentalHealth.com National Association for Research & Therapy for Homosexuality narth.com Regeneration Books (Exodus Member) 410-661-4337 Courage (Catholic) 212-268-1010 Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays Pfox.org Evergreen International (Mormons) Evergreen-intl.org%P1P?Z PP<%1D?BF FBBLB F"BF,z:/1GIJKLMN O R STVWhijklmnopqrst u!v"#$%&'()*+,-./Pb  ` f3Eh` ff` MMMwww` ff3f3>?" dd@,?nKd@  d @nK` d n?" dd@   @@``PR    @ ` ` p>> p h   (  T 1  "1  S BC1DEF ?Z B 0Z @1  S BB C DEF?rA r @\   S B+ C DEF?v*  v @   S BCIDEF??H\ @ I  N̜gֳgֳ ?"  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Son-1 D2 (  f|cmgֳgֳp?@ :Mother d2 ( <p?@ 0   ( Zfmgֳgֳ?   :Daughter  d  ( <p?@ @ d  ( <p?@    ( T@kmgֳgֳ?V v  7Son-2 dB  ( <p?P dB ( <p?P 0 dB ( <p?` dB ( <p?PpB ( HD)?0  (  f~m1?   x>Son attempts to attach to father for Gender-Identity formation?(2?DfN ( 6޽h ? f3Ehh  ' 5   0v (  0 0  `0mgֳgֳ ?  m  0  `mgֳgֳ ?   m dB 0 <)?P0P 0 Zmgֳgֳp?  8Father  0 T8mgֳgֳ?`  ? Son-1 D2 0  fЏmgֳgֳp?@ :Mother d2 0 <p?@ 0   0 Z$mgֳgֳ?   :Daughter  d  0 <p?@ @ d  0 <p?@    0 T̗mgֳgֳ?V v  7Son-2 dB  0 <p?P dB 0 <p?P 0 dB 0 <p?` dB 0 <p?PpB 0 HD)?0 z 0  fm1?   Son s attempts to attach to father was rebuffed and he experiences rejection and hurtV(2VDfpB 0 HD)? N 0 6޽h ? f3Eh  (  5   8 (  8 8  `p mgֳgֳ ?  m  8  `,!mgֳgֳ ?   m dB 8 <)?P0P 8 Z#mgֳgֳp?  8Father  8 Tx&mgֳgֳ?`  ? Son-1 D2 8  f*mgֳgֳp?@ :Mother d2 8 <p?@ 0   8 Zwmgֳgֳ?   :Daughter  d  8 <p?@ @ d  8 <p?@    8 TԔmgֳgֳ?V v  7Son-2 dB  8 <p?P dB 8 <p?P 0 dB 8 <p?` dB 8 <p?PpB 8 HD)?0  8  fm1?   0Son s attempts to defend against more pain from rejection by defensively detaching from father s relationship emotionally"z8Z2zEfpB 8 HD)?  8  `Ȩm>?P0  > N 8 6޽h ? f3EhZ  ) 5   @h (  @ @  `mgֳgֳ ?  m  @  `mgֳgֳ ?   m dB @ <)?P0P @ Z`mgֳgֳp?  8Father  @ Tmgֳgֳ?`  ? Son-1 D2 @  fmgֳgֳp?@ :Mother d2 @ <p?@ 0   @ Zmgֳgֳ?   :Daughter  d  @ <p?@ @ d  @ <p?@    @ Tmgֳgֳ?V v  7Son-2 dB  @ <p?P dB @ <p?P 0 dB @ <p?` dB @ <p?PpB @ HD)?0 pB @ HD)? |B @ TD)?  0  @  f$m1?  |BSon has no choice but to re-attach with mom for emotional securityC(2CDf @  `hm>?P0  > N @ 6޽h ? f3Eh  * 5 y q 0H (  H H  `mgֳgֳ ?  m  H  `mgֳgֳ ?   m dB H <)?P0P H Zmgֳgֳp?  8Father  H Tmgֳgֳ?`  ? Son-1 D2 H  fmgֳgֳp?@ :Mother d2 H <p?@ 0   H Zmgֳgֳ?   :Daughter  d  H <p?@ @ d  H <p?@    H Tmgֳgֳ?V v  7Son-2 dB  H <p?P dB H <p?P 0 dB H <p?` dB H <p?PpB H HD)?0 pB H HD)? |B H TD)?  0 / H  fm1?  _Son has no choice but to re-attach with mom for emotional security Forming Defensive Attachment`(2`DfvB H ND)?P @`  H  `qm>?P0  > N H 6޽h ? f3Eh] + 5 @Pk(  P P  `ggֳgֳ ?    P  `dhgֳgֳ ?    dB P <)?P0P P Z8jgֳgֳp?  8Father  P Tmgֳgֳ?`  ? Son-1 D2 P  fHqgֳgֳp?@ :Mother d2 P <p?@ 0   P Ztgֳgֳ?   :Daughter  d  P <p?@ @ d  P <p?@    P TDygֳgֳ?V v  7Son-2 dB  P <p?P dB P <p?P 0 dB P <p?` dB P <p?PpB P HD)?0  P  f1?   D(2D pB P HD)? |B P TD)?  0 7 P  f1?  gSon generalizes defensive detachment to defensively attach to girls and women: Non- aggressive & softerh(2hDfvB P ND)?P @`  P  `>?P0  > vB P@ ND)?  N P 6޽h ? f3EhX ,  5 PXf(  X X  `gֳgֳ ?    X  `gֳgֳ ?    dB X <)?P0P X ZtXgֳgֳp?  8Father  X TD\gֳgֳ?`  ? Son-1 D2 X  f_gֳgֳp?@ :Mother d2 X <p?@ 0   X Z䈸gֳgֳ?   :Daughter  d  X <p?@ @ d  X <p?@    X T$gֳgֳ?V v  7Son-2 dB  X <p?P dB X <p?P 0 dB X <p?` dB X <p?PpB X HD)?0 pB X HD)? |B X TD)?  0 6 X  fX1?  4Generalization intensifies. Father becomes a stanger.5(2DfDf-vB X ND)?P @`  X  `4>?P0  > vB X@ ND)?  2 X  fo?  X  f1?`   @Girl 1 2F2 X  fo? P  X  fø1? P  @Girl 2 2FpB X@ HD)? 0 vB X@ ND)? N X 6޽h ? f3Eh -  5 ` `*(  ` `  `ʸgֳgֳ ?    `  `l˸gֳgֳ ?    dB ` <)?P0P ` Z@͸gֳgֳp?  8Father  ` Tиgֳgֳ?`  ? Son-1 D2 `  f,ָgֳgֳp?@ :Mother d2 ` <p?@ 0   ` Zظgֳgֳ?   :Daughter  d  ` <p?@ @ d  ` <p?@    ` TdӸgֳgֳ?V v  7Son-2 dB  ` <p?P dB ` <p?P 0 dB ` <p?` dB ` <p?PpB ` HD)?0 pB ` HD)? |B ` TD)?  0  `  fhR1?  x.Generalization intensifies. Men are unfamiliar./(2DfDfvB ` ND)?P @`  `  `(>?P0  > vB `@ ND)?  2 `  fo?  `  f1?`   @Girl 1 2F2 `  fo? P  `  f,1? P  @Girl 2 2FpB `@ HD)? 0 vB `@ ND)? 2 `  fo?P @  `  f|1?p 0 @ Girlfriend 2 pB  ` HD)? N ` 6޽h ? f3Eh .  5 ump##h(  h h  `gֳgֳ ?    h  `\gֳgֳ ?    dB h <)?P0P h Z0gֳgֳp?  8Father  h T<gֳgֳ?`  ? Son-1 D2 h  fTgֳgֳp?@ :Mother d2 h <p?@ 0   h ZLgֳgֳ?   :Daughter  d  h <p?@ @ d  h <p?@    h Tlgֳgֳ?V v  7Son-2 dB  h <p?P dB h <p?P 0 dB h <p?` dB h <p?PpB h HD)?0 pB h HD)? |B h TD)?  0  h  f:1?   b&Men are objectified-curious-sexualized '8Z2'DfvB h ND)?P @`  h  `>?P0  > vB h@ ND)?  2 h  fo?  h  f81?`   @Girl 1 2F2 h  fo? P  h  fc1? P  @Girl 2 2FpB h@ HD)? 0 vB h@ ND)? 2 h  fo?P @  h  fԳ1?p 0 @ Girlfriend 2 pB  h HD)? 2 !h  fԔ? "h  f8س1?@0t 9Grandma 2vB #h ND)? 0 N h 6޽h ? f3Eh /  5 YQ&&p(  p p  `ܳgֳgֳ ?    p  `ٳgֳgֳ ?    dB p <)?P0P p Zgֳgֳp?  8Father  p Tgֳgֳ?`  ? Son-1 D2 p  fgֳgֳp?@ :Mother